Random Rita ~ Friday Feature Fics!

♥

Evenin’, ladies!

Friday Featured Author woulda been a better title for today’s post LOL!

My introduction to Bower-of-Bliss came by way of Clairebamboozle waaay back in December 2012 tellin’ me all about this super fun fic she’d come across called Drowning, not waving, which turned out to be written by one of our Aussie sisters!

Little did I know just how addicted I was gonna get to BoB’s fics!

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7385794/1/Drowning-not-waving

30 year old Bella Swan is the swimming instructor who teaches the Sunday morning daddy and baby classes.  Although he’s a forbidden man, her attraction to Edward Cullen, the newest daddy to join the Waterbabes group, is instantaneous. Can Bella drown her libido and maintain her professionalism? B x E x H2O equals slippery when wet. All Human. Minimal angst. Complete.

Rated: Fiction M – English – Humor/Romance – Bella, Edward – Chapters: 154 – Words: 269,073 – Reviews: 9,352 – Favs: 3,176 – Follows: 3,525 – Updated: Sep 30, 2013 – Published: Sep 16, 2011 – Status: Complete – id: 7385794

Okay, I hear you groanin’, “Oh, no! Not another Daddyward fic!” but trust me…it’s all a misunderstandin’!

Edward is the last to get out, and as he passes Milly to me, I get a much closer look at the tattoo on his bicep. It is in the shape of a black crusader shield. In the center is a white, downward pointing sword. A third of the way down the length of the blade, what I had previously thought were wings, turn out to be light-blue flames. Below the flames, inked in black across the length of a mid-blue cloth banner, is a motto. It appears to be written in Latin.

Qui audet adipiscitur.

The whole emblem is detailed in black and outlined in red ink.

Oh, did I forget to mention we have an ex-SAS Tattward on our hands? He rides a motorcycle, he’s a helicopter pilot AND he owns a Corsair 37-foot Bluewater Cruiser, as well!

Oh, yeah!!!

What with friends, family and herself cockblockin’ at every turn, it takes a while for Edward and Bella to finally get it on…and when they do, AND WHEN THEY DOOOO!?!

Well, you’ll just have to read to find out but you won’t be disappointed!

~oOo~

More recently, I’d been completely caught up in BoB’s current WIP, Rescue to Release, when a plot bunny bit her and she had to take a side trip to feed the beast LOL!

Honestly, I have NO IDEA what anyone finds so fascinatin’ about the sport of cricket….sorry, just no! Guess you have to be born to it!?!

However, knowin’ BoB’s wicked sense of humor by now, I dived in and enjoyed the hell out of It’s Just Not Cricket!

{banner by FallingSnow Winter}

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11025321/1/It-s-Just-Not-Cricket

From Wikipedia – Cricket is a unique game where in addition to the laws, the players must abide by the Spirit of the Game. The standard of sportsmanship has historically been considered so high that the phrase “it’s just not cricket” was coined in the 19th Century to describe unfair or underhanded behaviour in any walk of life.

Rated: Fiction M – English – Humor/Romance – Bella, Edward, James – Chapters: 6 – Words: 27,620 – Reviews: 182 – Favs: 102 – Follows: 168 – Updated: Mar 3 – Published: Feb 6 – Status: Complete – id: 11025321

In this story, Edward is a registered nurse specializin’ in anesthetics. He’ll do anything not to have to assist Dr. Doolan LOL!

The last person to enter the operating room is James Doolan, the on-call Orthopaedic Registrar for tonight, and I have to suppress the urge to groan out loud. Doctor Doolan (AKA Doctor Douchebag) is the most conceited son-of-a-bitch I’ve come across. I first met him years ago when he was an intern at the kid’s hospital. He wasn’t too bad back then, but as he has advanced through the roles of Resident Medical Officer, and then Registrar, his ego has expanded accordingly.

Through hilariously gross, extenuatin’ circumstances, Edward has to assume the persona of ‘Smash,’ the Adelaide Strikers mascot and superhero, cartoon-type character for the T-20 Big Bash game between the Adelaide Strikers and Sydney Thunder.

To give you an idea what Edward’s performance might look like:

Durin’ a pause due to rain, he accidently on purpose abducts said Doctor Dochebag’s girlfriend!

Isabella smiles at the {KissCam}camera, but James doesn’t seem to notice what is going on. He appears to be looking at something on his phone. She looks at James and says something, but he just shakes his head. She looks back at the camera, smiles sweetly and then waves, but the bucketheads can smell the blood in the water and they boo loudly.

What the fuck is James’ problem?

He’s sitting next to his hot, young girlfriend and it seems he can’t even be bothered to give her the time of day, let alone a kiss for the camera. What a fucking moron! If she were my girl, everyone in this stadium would know, undeniably, my feelings for her. Hell! Everyone watching the telecast throughout Australia would know she was mine.

Without a conscious thought on my part, I find myself running down towards the front row. On reaching her seat, I bend down and scoop her up into my arms. Then I turn and start running back up the aisle towards the stadium complex. Compared to me, Isabella is a tiny little thing and seems to weigh nothing at all. She wraps her arms around my neck, and I laugh when I hear her shrieking and giggling hysterically. A loud roar explodes from the crowd just as I reach the top of the aisle. I have no idea of what is going on behind me, but I don’t take the time to pause, just in case James is chasing after me having realised that I’ve just taken his girl.

Edward Masen is a lover, not a fighter.

Shamwows are highly recommended while readin’ this short but immensely sweet and funny fic LMAO!

~oOo~

Finally, I’m reccin’ another WIP but what a fabulous WIP it is *swoon!*

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10228577/1/Rescue-To-Release

“As a cinematographer, I’ve given some thoughts to how I might die, but never in my wildest dreams did I think I’d die of dehydration, cut up and bleeding while perched in a tree in the middle of the Australian outback. As you can see, Sam is down below. He’s an insane and perpetually randy, 7-foot tall, alpha-male kangaroo, and he belongs to that equally mental bloke, Cullen.”

Rated: Fiction M – English – Adventure/Romance – Bella, Edward – Chapters: 11 – Words: 86,071 – Reviews: 514 – Favs: 295 – Follows: 534 – Updated: 13h ago – Published: Mar 30, 2014 – id: 10228577

“Whoa! Who’s that guy?”

I look back at the screen and see Cullen’s green-eyed gaze staring back at me. “Oh, that’s Cullen, also known as Boomer… And God, apparently,” I add with a giggle when I think about his When Harry Met Sally impersonation when we were in the tent.

She lets out a wolf whistle. “He’s dishy,” she says with a look of admiration at the screen.

Angela sits down and grabs the cordless phone from its charging cradle. She dials the number for the reception desk to let Rose know what’s going on, and within a minute, Rose races through the door.

“Hope you haven’t started without me,” she says, gasping for breath.

“You can take it from here, Bella,” Stefan says as he stands up from the high-backed, leather chair. “I don’t want to be here listening to these two while they pant like horny teenagers and cream their knickers.”

The first image that comes on the screen is of a shirtless Cullen standing in Esme’s kitchen. He’s preparing a bottle of formula with one hand, while cradling the little joey, Edward, against his body with the other.

I begin to read out the narration that Stefan and I have come up with so far.

“In the heart of outback Australia, in a place not far from Alice Springs, an ordinary man is living an extraordinary life…”

While I absolutely adored Drowning, not waving and It’s Just Not Cricket, my heart belongs to Boomer…as will yours *SWOON!*

{banner by FallingSnow Winter}

A rather long post, this time, but I blame all the pretty banners I couldn’t leave behind LOL!

Now that I’ve showed you mine…you show me yours!

Happy Friday, y’all!

Rita