Tag Archives: Vanity Fair

Sensual Sunday ~ Your Guide to the Promised Land!

Wet Rob AviGood evenin’, ladies!

I know I’m very late, but it’s GOT to still be Sunday somewhere in the world, right?

You can probably tell from the title that I got my perve on today LOL!

Yup! I’ll be examinin’ that typical male leg spread that leads us to “The Promised Land!”

It’s a guy thing and Rob, king of all guys, will be demonstrating some of the subtle nuances {whether he wants to or not}!

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I call this the Semi-Open Invitation!  Rob’s feelin’ good about himself and is open to communication, but that’s it…no touchie feelie shit allowed!


Seein’ as he’s hunched over Hidin’ the Goods, I’d say the invitation is hereby revoked… don’t expect anythin’ more’n a polite howdy do!


Rob’s Alpha Male Signal to all other dudes to back the fuck off…he’s Numero Uno!


Which, at the same time, is his Matin’ Display to the ladies!


Well, I’m sure as hell ready to be mated LMAO!!!


And I know I’m not the only one!  DIED an’ Gone to Heaven *groan!*

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This subtle signal means Rob’s Not Available no matter how funny and cute you are!


Rob’s You Do All The Work display! {startin’ with gettin’ rid of that belt *THUD!*}


Who’s up for a matin’ session with Rob on that hammock? Raise your hands!!!


Awww, Rob! Fair warnin’…we’re not above molestin’ you in your sleep LOL!


Heheheh! I thought that would get his attention…he wouldn’t wanna miss anything, right?


Subliminal Size Suggestion! By puttin’ a couple large, inaminate objects between Rob’s legs, we are subconsciously lead to assume there’s more than enough to go around LOL!


I’m sure it wasn’t meant to be so suggestive as to be downright scary, but whoever took that photo wasn’t takin’ our pervy little minds into consideration!!!


If they knew us at all, they’d know that we are, at this moment, measurin’ Rob’s hands, fingers and thumb LMAO!!!


Not to mention his feet LMAO!!!


And the results of our measurements have just been confirmed by Rob himself ROTFLMAO!!! {Poor Matt gave up and crossed his legs in shame!}


Ultimately, Rob’s Wide Legged Straddle is an invitation to be, well…straddled!


Excuse me while I live vicariously for an hour or two…maybe longer *le sigh!*


Oops! A blatant signal from Rob that he’s had enough for today!

Until next time!!!

Happy Sunday, y’all!


Night Raider


Filed under Rita01tx, Robert Pattinson, Sensual Sunday

Sensual Sunday ~ The Birthday Hangover!


Good afternoon, ladies!

Well, after a whole week of partying with our friends to celebrate Rob’s 26th birthday, I didn’t know if I’d even have the energy to  get out of bed this morning!

Hell’n I wonder if Rob survived his own birthday bash! Let’s go find out, shall we?

Knock, knock!! {cracks open Rob’s bedroom door} *Shhhhhh!*


*Whispers* Awwww, he’s still asleep! Just look at him…precious angel! But, not for long…

ROB! Wake up! You got company!!

Zzz…wha…? Rita? What the fuck?

Open them pretty eyes, baby!

Damnit, woman! It’s the ass crack of dawn…what’re you doing here?

You’re in my time zone, darlin’, and it’s way past NOON! I just came by to see how you was feelin’!

Like Hell, if you must know…can’t I just go back to sleep?

Anythin’ I can do to make you feel better, angel? Breakfast in bed, maybe?

*Groan!* God, Rita! Don’t even mention food to me right now!

Well, come on down to the kitchen, then, and I’ll make you some coffee…how’s that sound?

Strong and black, if you don’t mind, thanks!

Sure thing, baby! Comin’ right up!

Owww, my head is killing me!

You want a couple aspirin for your headache, darlin’?

You got some? Yeah, that’d be great…you’re a star, Rita!

No problem, hon! You startin’ to feel a little bit better?

Umm, yeah, thanks.  Rita? I appreciate all your help, but I really need to get my ass in gear!

*Gigglesnort!* You goin’ out lookin’ like that?  What WILL the neighbors think? BWAHAHAHA!

Huh? Aw, hell, Rita!

Have a good day, Rob! Laters BB! MWAH!!!

*Pssst!* Ladies! Don’t tell Rita, but her coffee sucks ass! Had to find a Starbucks FAST!!

Happy Sunday, ya’ll!



Filed under Because he gives us a Reason to smile., Bel Ami, Remember Me, Rob Pattinson, Sensual Sunday

Sensual Sunday ~ Rob…When I Think of You, I Touch Myself!

Hi ya’ll!

You’ve probably all seen the outtakes from Rob’s photoshoot by Mark Segal in 2008, right?  It’s one of my favorites…hard to choose, I know, but THIS photo reminded me of all the times Rob touches his face, especially with that delicious looking thumb of his!

Wonder what it tastes like?  GAH!

Click it!  It’s HUGE (twss)!!!!

Wonder if that bottom lip would feel soft soft soft on MY thumb!

Of course, when I heard this song the other day, it made me think of Rob.  What doesn’t LOL?

A quick search of YouTube delivered this lovely vid by unicorns429!

So, yeah, when I see photos of Rob touching himself, I can’t help wishing those were MY fingers stroking his face… or anywhere else, for that matter!

Would I like to be dipping MY fingers down his shirt?  HELL YES!!

Would I like that to be MY hand he’s holding? Stupid question!

I’d purely LOVE for those long fingers to be stroking MY neck…

Rob’s hand sneaking down towards MY ass?  Yes, PLEASE!

A full body touch from Rob and I could die a happy, happy hOOr!

Hell’n imagining Rob touching me ANYWHERE has me fanning my lady bits *phew!*

But that’s not gonna happen, is it?

Damnit, Rob!  Let a girl dream, will ya???

Happy Sunday, ya’ll!



Filed under Addicted, Fingerporn, Rob Pattinson, Sensual Sunday, Thumb

Seeing “The Light Of Day”

Hello Everybody *waves*


The Vanity Fair issue cover was released today. The issue will be available the third of March. In all seriousness, I haven’t been this upset over things that are beyond my control in years. While this blog site was designed for fun and the admiration of a man who is unimagineably attractive this is NOT going to be a “Happy, Perving Over The Pretty’s New Photoshoot Blog.” You’ve been warned.

I know I’m just a faceless voice in a sea of millions and what I say won’t amount to a hill of beans to anybody but to Quote Rob’s character Tyler From the movie Remember Me: “Whatever you do in life is insignificant but it’s important that you do it.”  Well I’m here to do my insignificant thing because I think it’s important!
After having read the Vanity Fair interview of Robert Pattinson several of my friends and I were overwhelmed by how distressed he seemed to be over the craziness surrounding the Twilight Franchise Mania. In particular the Hordes of fans and Paparazzi that hound him endlessly. You can read the article here. Along with the gorgeous pics of Rob. http://robpattinson.blogspot.com/2011/03/robs-vanity-fair-pictures-inside.html
After having read the article I posted the following on one of my favorite Pattinson blogs.
Dear Rob,
My heart is breaking for you! I hope things get better and calm down a little for you. Most of all I hope and Pray You get what YOU want. Take a break for a while when you are done filming BD. I promise whatever project you have in the works will wait for you if need be. If it wont so what? It’s not worth your health and happiness. Twilight may be clinging to you like a bunch of screaming fangirls but Baby, you’ve already broken free of it! Ask anyone here. Twilight isn’t why we care, YOU are why we care and You are what we care about. Get a friend to get a cabin for you out in the boondocks where there’s no one around for miles and just be Rob. Please? Take some books, some music, some movies and a notebook/computer (Whatever you use to write) and be You! Take the time to be Rob. Don’t worry about anything else, Your truly loyal fans will still be here when you get back! Why? Because we love you and we want you to be happy!!!!!
With Love,& Prayers
However, the longer I thought about it the more upset I got. Especially when people were not taking the time to read the article behind the pretty pictures. It was just too much like looking in his face and pretending to listen to him. It was all so Patronizing it quite literally pissed me off! So after silently fuming for awhile I decided to say what was on my mind. So i went back to the same blog and posted the following post…
TO the General Public: I haven’t even Begun to RANT over this Topic! As I’ve said many times I never got into the fan thing even as a child, not ever. Living in the States I did not follow Princess Diana’s life but when she died we too were flooded with the media from it. When I learned the paps follwed them into the tunnel I was furious! That wasn’t right and I said back then that there should be a law against this shizz. Back then I called it “The Light Of Day law”.
 As a celebrity I believe you have to accept the fact that people are going to be up in your business but There HAS to be A LINE DRAWN SOMEWHERE! There needs to be a law passed that unless it is a red carpet style event, an interview, a premiere, a news conference or a scheduled public event etc. held in the open “Light Of Day”  Anyone following, harassing, lying in wait, shouting, screaming at, or photographing, WHAT THE F**K EVER Should be considered in violation of that law. It should be considered as STALKING with the INTENT TO CAUSE BODILY and/or Emotional HARM. It should be Punishable to the FULL Extent of the Law. And the stalking laws should be made much harsher!!  THIS is a Man! A HUMAN BEING and not some Character in a book or a FF! Just because you admire a man’s looks and picture them in the character Does NOT make them that Character or Fantasy! WAKE UP and smell some reality people. If you TRULY cared about ROBERT PATTINSON you would want what’s best for HIM! And if this whole Twilight BS and fan craze is dragging him down then TO HELL WITH IT! Geez! Put yourself in his shoes. Try to imagine it’s YOU and you can’t even go outside because if you do you may be mauled to DEATH by those who supposedly “LOVE” you.
Luckily, most of the bloggers agreed with me. But I had a few friends, who, like me, wanted to do something a little bit more than just air out our feelings on a popular blog. I’m currently looking into a writing up a petition to see if we can create the “Light of Day” law and a fellow blogger is currently creating what she has deemed as the PFRC “Peace for Rob Corps” I’m not entirely sure what this consisits of but if you Care about Rob and/or any other celebrities who are constanly being hounded and harrassed by the paps and hordes of lunatic fans and would like to help out, please post a message to me here and I’ll give you further information as it becomes available to me. Thank you for reading this.

Vanity Fair Cover 2011

We got your Back baby!!!

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Filed under Freakin Paps Pffft!